Ca Ne Fait Rien - Part 6

Ca Ne Fait Rien 

22-2-18

At the 6^th Bn.

Concerts this week

quite a lot of

talent was

dug-up, Digger.

I would suggest

that we chuck

up Fighting

and go on the 

stage

Illustration - see original document

Is this the

reason the

Sergts. failed

to put on that

wonderful

play

"7 Days C.B."

Illustration - see original document

Lieut.

Samuels

tool a

mild 

interest 

in the

Officers

V Sergt.

game.

Illustration - see original document

Does the Umpire 

always go in for

a bathe during

a game

?

Illustration - see original document

Semi

Official 
photo

The enemy mad a successful raid on Doo

and Beer Coys capturing much sugar

Illustration - see original document

The Quartermaster

was hot stuff

among the

little

sergeants.

Ask sergt.

Phillpot

and Dutton

Illustration - see original document

I wonder if that

Brigade Team are

satisfied now?

We finished with 8 goals

to the good.

Illustration - see original document

C.Q.M.S.

Kirby put

up a good

game and

he and Mutt

Barker were

there with the

bells on.

Illustration - see original document

Who's which in the 6^th

Sergt. George Hewitt forgot

to send us a piece of cake

but he has our congratulations

just the same.

"What about it

George?"

Illustration - see original document

Mutt Barker

seemed to

enjoy the 

game

Illustration - see original document

The success of the

concerts was due to

the untiring efforts of

Major Carter. He was always

on the job with that jolly

smile

of

his

Illustration - see original document

Mull says he

is going into the Rag and Bone

Profession when

he gets

back

Illustration - see original document

GOO

22-2-18

12-6

"Ca Ne Fait Rein"

1-3-18

I gota pretty good story to tell you blokes

about one of the officers:- It happened comme sa

one officer fixed a bottle of dope to look like

"Kirsh" a liqueur from Normandy and asked

another Hofficer to "comeanaveadrink" the

second bloke got suspicious 'cos he know the first

bloke never bought a drink for anyone but himself,

and got asking questions about it. There was 

also another Hofficer standing by who was

of a quiet and trustful disposition. Seeing a drink

going begging he grabs the glass an sez 'eres 'ow

an gulps down the glass of peroxide. Selah

Hand drawn picture - see orignal document  

Who was that bloke in C. Coy. who did this

Ain't it a fair cow! yer tells that

"Blighty: girl that all Anzacs are

born in the

saddle, don't

cher know.

then that blam

hired horse goes 

an' does this

t 'yer. Its a 

fair cow 

orlright.

Hand drawn picture - see original document

 Any Old

Aussie

on Paris 

Leave

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Lieut. M.A. Abson

winner of the cup

presented by the

sergeants, for the

best officer's

item at the 

Battalion Concerts

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Who's Which in the 6^th

Pte. Butler, H.Qs Staff

a direct descendent

of the elder

Pitt,

Butler

inherits

many of the

characteristics

of

this great

statesman.

We don't think,

However he's

a pretty 

good sport.

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Lieut. Johnnie Walker, the

Leave king and therefore popular,

Joined up from 7^th Bn.

"still going strong"

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Tom Williamson

is the bloke

wot puts

the patches

on our

pants.

We will

say he

always

makes a 

good job of

'em.

He is now away

on Blighty leave

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Goo 

1.3.18

Published in the Field

every Friday (sometimes)

[*6^th Bn A.I.*]

Ca Ne Fait Rien

Circulation 

over 6 million

[*12-7*]

1.3.18

Poetry and Worse-er-Verse

(Printers error. Ed.)

The Bugle Band

There's a little bunch o' cobbers wots

livin' in our row,

They drinks a bit an swears a bit, an'

blows in all their dough.

The're only little cusses, 'bout knee-high

to a bee

The biggest of the bunch is nothing

over 4 foot 3.

The're known to the Heads as the

fife an' bugle band.

But when they plays a tune, we'v're

got to stop an' stand

If we moves a foot, we're out

o' step an' stubbin

of our toes.

The only time they keep in time is when

 we stands in rows.

But in spite of these 'ere failin's

the're a pretty willing crew

They always goes an' does it when

the're's any work to do.

The last time we was in the line

an likewise down at "Epe

They works all day and every night

with hardly any sleep.

The Quartermaster bloke 'e sez

they'll go through shot an' shell

They'll help to get the rations up

if the troops attack in Hell.

______________________________

HORSE

This is a tale wos told to me

By a fellow wots been in Don Compance,

'E sez "that once while at the war"

In 19,18 and perhaps before,

The rations were short an' the nights

were cold

An' a pound of meat cost a ton

of gold

Don Compance was ready to fight

But every man turned sick at the sight

Of a horse or camel or very sick cow

For nobody knew when they'd get it for

chow.

Now it may be true an' it may be not,

But I reckon this yarn is pretty hot.

Wot was told to me in twenty three

By a fellow from old Don Compance.

CORRESPONDENCE

To the editor, Ce ne fait rien, Dear Sir

I think the following matter should

be brought to the notice of your

numerous and intelligent readers.

A horse broke his leg at the transport

lines, I saw him shot, skinned

and cut up. Next morning we has

fried steak for brekfas. now;

Gorstruth, digger! I leave it to 

you, what'd you think? Yes

we thought so to an' didn't eat

the d- stuff. Pte Don.C. Company

______________________

VARIOUS ?????

Do they put sand in the biscuit 

flour to aid digestion or to make up

weight.?_________________

Who the 'ell pinched that extra

blanket and shapekin out of the

roll, when we moved from Kemmel Huts.?

Has the Pay Sergeant gone to

Blighty to see if he can find his

decoration and a few missing teeth?

What that shell came over, did

Elise bolt or was a certain officer

anxious to get back to supper?

Has the Padre exercised that

horse yet?_________________

What, the dickens! is that dope

they make out of rice and cheese,

I dips me lid, to that transport

bird that managed to get absolutely

blind, by 11 a.m on the day of the

move.__________________

Who's been selling the family plate

to pay their bridge and poker debts?

Where did Cpl. Mayne get the good

oil about putting in for extra

marriage leave?_________

Trips to Australia for Hardy soldiers

you Battles (bet ills) and sickness won't

stop 'em from catching the boat,

O'Keefe off the grass, three men have

gone already, who's next.

Fiction Page

THE WAR

From our correspondent at the front:-

a swiss merchant who has just returned

from Hunania states that the German

Higher Command are preparing for

the comming offensive at a feverish

rate, Thousand of shallow draught

submarines are being turned out daily.

These are to be used on nights when

there is a heavy dew and will sink

at sight all supply wagons.

A new and deadly gas is being

prepared by boiling down politicians

After a recent air raid by the enemy

a number of barrels of good beer

were found near various camps, it

is thought that this is an attempt

to kill our troops by shock.

The understudy of the M'wanbar

of Gamfulia in his opening parlimentary

speech said that, that country would

sever diplomatic relations with Germany

if the trade in [[polled?]]. Methodist

Missionary was interfered with in any 

way, Great excitement prevails and

it is understood that the fleet will

be dispatched to aid the Allies, already

it has been fitted with a new paddle.

                                                          

R.F.C. Reports:- Yesterday one of our

mechanics failed to return, his leave

expired the day previous,

In Arial combats this week our planes

brought down 501 of the enemy, 555004

Thus were driven down out of control

by our planes. Our Anti-air craft guns

put a shot so near an enemy plane

that you could tell what it was

aimed at.

It is rumoured that the ex-Czar of

Russia disguised as the unexpended portion

of the day's rations, has escaped to

[[Formic?]]

Battation Beauties

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Hervey's Heifer Mag's Moll

Our Short Story

The ceasless drip, drip of the rain outside

had almost put us to sleep in spite of

the discomforts of wet clothing and a touch

of trench feet. Me an' me cobber are Bn.

runners. The battalion had just moved

into the line the day before and we had

been on the go all day with messages to

Bde. H.Q's and the companies forward.

The rain had been falling continuously for

over 48 hours, you know the kind, lives!

it starts with a heavy, white, damp, mist

which soon has big drops of water falling

from every twig, then as it gets dark

a drizzling rain sets in. A few shells

whine somewhere to the right, mostly

ending with muffled plops in the

sodden earth. We managed to [[hear?]]

a couple of meals from friendly

"babbling brooks" near the support lines

during the day. but our dugout is a [[pub?]]

no chance to build up its rotten sides

Out with these d- messages all day.

Well! at last we are relieved and we

gets a roof fixed up with old ground

sheets and hessian, has a pretty good

feed fixed up by old Dave Oliver an' turns

in. As I started out to say we had 

almost got to sleep; when something, wet

silent and slithery presses on our legs, we

flashes a torch, the blasted wall had turned

to mud an' run out of the rotten sand bags.

to be continued

CA NE FAIT RIEN, 8-3-18

THE LITTLE 

BROWN BOXER

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Why is it that if you take a bunch of hats like this and any ordinary Billjim like this

and you put them together, you get this result.

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Who 

is the 

Babbling 

Brook 

who looks 

like this 

around 

the Coy 

Cookhouse

And was 

seen like 

this in London 

recently.

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Semi official war photo:-

Working party from a Pioneer Battalion

doing road repairs.

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Shay Bill, Hic! it

wash lucky for us

they turned this hut

into a Quartermaster's

Store instead of

a Gum

Boot

room.

Hand drawn picture - see original document

Who's which in the 6^TH 

C.Q.M.S.

Kirby A.Coy

One of the 1919's

Wounded on Gallipoli

Always there in a fight

or a Football match and

ready to use his

weight in 

either.

Lieut.

Bill Rashinger

just rejoined from T.B. where his

sunny smile was ever on tap.

Like a sheep 

returning to

the Fold, capt.

J.D. Johnston

comes back to

the 6th Battalion

after being in

command of

those horrible people

who draw the crabs,

the T.M.B. for

many moons.

Illustration - see original document

Goo

8.3.18

Published in the Field

every Friday (Sometimes)

on sale everywhere thats anywhere

Ca Ne Fait Rien

[*6th BnA.I*]

Circulation. Over 6 Millions

Friday 8-3-18

SPORTING 

NEWS

Illustration - see original document

For the Haig Handicap

"Over-the-bags" is no longer a

favourite. A lot of sports

fancy "Blighty" and "Base-job,

"Mills Bomb" is in good condition

and ^should go off well. "Very Light"

will be seen to advantage.

We predict that "Fritz" will be

amongst the also rans.

THE WAR

From our special correspondent.

It is reported that most of the

German workmen are on strike.

Conditions are so sirious that the

population is reduced to eating

celuloid collars and if the men

remain out much longer only Anzac

stew will be available for the 

staring population.

Berlin official:- All the Town-hall

clocks have been stopped so the

strike is finished.

The Bugawar of Hazaguan was

assassinated last night after a stormy

meeting in the cabinet. A German

disguised as a garbage tin is believed 
  to have been the murderer.

There is a serious shortage of N^o 9's

but the Doc. will supply a N^o 4 and 5.

R.F.C. report:- Yesterday one of our

planes dropped bombs on Mt. Vesuvius

Fires were observed.

Firing is reported near Ypres, it says

so in John Bull.

About 7o'clock yesterday the enemy

shelled some walnuts.

Nar Poetry

"Gorblimy! " Mister Editor" I wants to raise a point;

This rhyme that you are printin' is clearly out of [[?]],

You sings about the sergeants, the band, and such like coves

But now you'll get the "good oil" from one who really knows

So cut out all this barracking and spend a bit of times

Upon the men wot does it, "the privates of the line."

They gets up early, does fatigues and goes where'er the're led,

Except of course, once in awhile, they tries to seeing the lead.

They drills and fights, does guards at nights an' ate the hostile Hun

And once in every fourteen days they gets a little mon.

Which, some, they goes and spends on booze

Or at two-up the whole lot lose.

Now honest! "Mister Editor I'll put it to you straight

If all the privates stayed at 'ome. Who'd say the [[?]] of hate?

Who'd stick the Bosches, bomb to Hun, and carry shells up to the gun?

Gorstruth! with generals in the trench defendin' this 'ere line.

And majors manning every post thats just above a mine

Leiutenant Colonels wiring in No-mans-land at night.

With N.C.O's and Officers to back them in a fight

Why, blow me tight and strike me pink! this 'ere bloomin' war

Would have been won by Germany in XXXXX nineteen, one

and four.

Fench Beer

I was sitting wrapped in quiet thought

In Peré Moulin's Estaminet,

Thinking of beer and booze, that I had bought

And all the fun that they had sent my way.

My thoughts returned to Little Burke and Loxs.,

In Peré Moulin's Estaminet,

I thought of bosker cobber's, bon ton hommes

Who'd have a drink with you but never pay.

Ah! well, those pals will never sit with me

In Pere Moulin's Estaminet,

The beer that Pere brews must surely be

Made of raw spuds and new mown hay.

                                                     

Eight little officers went to see a show,

Someone else had pinched their seats

And they had nowhere else to go.

Eight little officers walking home quite late

One caught a motor car

And filled their heart with hate.

Eight little officers, sore as sore can be,

One told the tale to us

Now which one can it be?

Battalion Beauties

Illustration - see original document

Polmeer's Pet

Wilson's Wack

Somebodies Skirt

Things We Would Like To Know

if any of A Coy. officers got a reply

from the actress ladies?

if Pitt intends to let 'em grow 

again?

if they put the tar on the hats to

keep the boy's from indulging in that 

"Aussie" habit of leaning against the

wall?

if Lieut Demaine got some on the

seat of his pants?

if Sergt Focoe came an abdominal?

if A Coy. wore out their boots because

the estaminet at Tilques is 5 miles

from the camp?

if A Coy. will ever tell what really

happened at Tilques?

if anyone knows who started

the gag about the "little, brown

boxer? and why?

Who are the hard-heads?

if Cpl. Stewart B. Findlay is over or

a week end trip?

if Lieut Rashinger knows who

rationed yer, while he was in Blighty?

if Don Company knows there is

another dead horse at the transport

lines?

If certain officers walked all the way

to the Bde concert at La Clytle and

found their seats taken?

If it is true that Sergt, Don is on his

way to the Bn.? Good luck to him.

If the "Guards" are in this camp?

If the pioneer sergeant asked a one

legged man to 'ser a drink?

If a certain R.S.M. kisses all his

letters addressed to Castre?

Our Short Story

I beg to state that I have been

in the front line trenches for

10000006 days without missing a

minute. I left Aussie in 1914 am

have been wounded 47 times, I have

only one Mother who is my sole

support. My property in Aussie

consists of 15 acres of prickly pear

plantations and a sheep run, or 

at least I have a dog that will

make the sheep run. My property

needs my personal attention as

it has been siezed by my Aunt,

my parents are both dead and

my father is in very delicate

health. :- (Note by Editor):-

That writer chap who was going

to do the short story this week

got a bit mixed, he thought

he was putting in for that

Australian duty stunt, the dinkum

story is below

                                          

"The White Company" by Wm. Shakespere

"Beware of the widdies" said the elder